The last few weeks have been hectic – the kind of weeks where you try not to think about all the commitments and just push through. I try so hard to avoid those and I’ve put off lessons and signing up for activities in an attempt to savor these days at home together.
BUT the child has to learn to swim! So we last week we rushed. As we headed out of the parking lot I handed her a little snack – a ziplock bag with the remainder of yesterday’s bunny-shaped graham crackers to tide her over until dinner. We had our usual banter and I said, “Can I have one of your bunny grahams?” She said, “Noooo. You can’t have one.” I simply replied with,”ok.” But then she had a change of heart! She said, “Oh! Here, you can have this broken one Mommy” and I kind of laughed and replied with an enthusiastic, “Thanks sweetie! So nice of you to share!”
In that moment I thought, this is a little bit like Motherhood in general. For all your effort, and work and worry, you don’t always get the hug, or the kiss and sometimes they push you away all together. But it doesn’t hurt your feelings (too much) and you keep going. You wipe, wash, carry, wrangle, clean and correct. And then…they offer you the cast-off bunny graham. It’s clearly been maimed and damaged somewhere between the pantry and the crazy mommy purse- but it’s a gesture of sweetness none the less, and I’ll take it.